From You, For You.

This post, I've prepared for 2 weeks. 

I just couldn't complete it. But now, I have to complete it.

All these memories, the photos, the smile, the laughter, the tears...

I will never forget. I can't forget.

Firstly, I need to say

I'M SORRY.

Sorry for what I did, I hurt both of us. 

Now, let me take the punishment, let me take the pain, let me suffer for the consequences,everything...

As long as you're happy :)

If the way you chose would make you feel better, I will deal with it.

Maybe you're better of without me.

I have to say, I'm not a good friend.

You will meet someone better, you deserve better. 

It's easy to find someone better than me. 'Cause I'm suck. 

I've been thinking what should I buy for you.

I was thinking to buy something for you on 30th. Too bad, I couldn't find what I want.

Until this morning, I realized, it might be a sign, to hint me everything is going to end.

I text my friends to ask some opinions, where to buy this & that.

One of them said, I must be a good friend, my best friend must be glad and proud.

I answered, I'm not a good friend. 

In fact, I proved that I was right. 

Another friend asked me, what is the present for?

I said, it's like a friendship gift or a goodbye gift.

Actually,there's another reason. I was thinking to buy you something to warming up so that everything can get back to normal.

Now, I'm thinking, it might not be necessary anymore.

You said let you be the bad one. Let me hate you.

Do you think I could hate you?

I wish I could. 

You said you wanna end this. You don't wanna suffer anymore.

I'm suffering too. But if this could make you feel better, I have nothing to insist.

I wish I could stop you. But I'm afraid I could not.

I'm not strong enough to stop you. If you feel happier, why should I stop you?

Why I can't just tell you what I feel?

Well, I asked this to myself for a thousand times. Still, I didn't get the answer.

Since when I like to run away & avoid everything in front of me?

Seriously, I have no idea.

I just don't know where to start. I just don't know what to do.

I just know I don't wanna lose you. Well, it's LOST.

People told me what I shouldn't do but no one tell me what should I do.

You stuck in my mind. 

I've been thinking of you.

Even a simple song can remind me of you.

You said I always 'pop out' in your mind. But I think it would never happen again.

Heartache, so what? Just let me suffer by myself.

There's no painkiller for me.

I feel that something pushing on me, something heavy on my chest. 

Breathless. Helpless. I'm worthless.

I didn't mean to not talk to you.

I just don't know what to talk about.

You have to study overseas. I took my time to digested. 

& I give you my best wishes. 

I did some mistakes. 

I'm trying to figure out something to make it right.

I haven't got the chance to make it right & you cut me down.

I'm not efficient on this kind of stuffs. 'Cause I need some times.

I think there's no chances for me anymore.

I think I'm destined to be a loser in friendship.

Never mind, I will find someone like you.

I wish I could find...

For your best friend in your future, I think she will give you things that I didn't give to you.

ILY.